HAPPINESS!
I have conscious dreams, sometimes, of things in this world that make me—HAPPY; filmstrip flickers across my mind’s screen. In view, I catch myself smiling in the middle of my tears.
Driving— Dodge Dynasty, diamond blue, in dark of night. CDs on repeat: Van Morrison, Hootie, Bob Seger, Tracy Chapman, Chris Rea… Loving them in the glow of dashboard lights.
Writing— in candle lit room full of flickers. Shadows dance beside dolphins dipping and diving oceans of wall posters. Wafting wisps of incense rise and whiffs meet my nose. Empty pages, white, and a pen before me, I stir words.
Studying— in the quiet still, ears massaged with rhythmic sound of Shepherd/Coyote cross, all long furred, beautifully brindled, breathing; soft puffs rippling her loose lips. I give sigh knowing someone feels my presence, even when I’m not in the same room.
Gazing— a full orb of silver moon rising to light a black night. Half the sky afloat in cotton ball clouds and the other sprinkled with depths of diamond stars glittering my eyes.
Returning— back home, Dillon, after a long weekend in Dixon with Mom. I-15 south… windshield frames Beaverhead Mountains opening up to lush valley. Sunset splays across the Big Hole, then Beaverhead rivers. Rolled down window, welcomes in cooled riverbed aroma dancing with alfalfa.
Remembering— long weekends, parent’s house, gardening, mowing lawn, gathering and inhaling loaded lilacs. Best mornings are 8 a.m. coffee, Swedish Pancakes, shuffle of newspaper, all while neighbors steady, drop in.
Unwinding— between everything: classes, jobs, travels, visits, gathering friends, mountain hikes, all of my likes, and even the Yikes! Calm closing comes to my eyes for an anytime, never scheduled, nap. T.V. plays, and my body hugs, all fuzzy blanket snug, into the cushions of the couch. Whiskey, not liquid, but my dog kid, curled into any space near my feet; nothing like our deep sleep.
I now enter sweet REM dream; my mind having watched the days conscious film flicks, all two thumbs up— for HAPPINESS! (1997 revised 2010)
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“Today I catch myself smiling in the middle of my tears”….. makes me feel like I’m allowed to cry some more today, thank you for this beautiful piece. 🤍
Perfect doze of Happiness to start my day!
We have so many things to be grateful for, thanks for sharing…. Now I want Swedish pancakes ☺️😁